“Summer lovin’ had me a blast. Summer lovin’ happened so fast”. — lyrics from “Summer Nights” from Grease. It’s a delicious fantasy, isn’t it? — falling in love while on vacation or on the summer job at the beach. Movies like Grease…
Posts published in “Marriage and Divorce”
You have a demanding career that requires a lot of your time and energy. So does your spouse. Maybe one of you—or both—travels for work. Maybe you’re also parents, and you also like to golf, practice yoga, take painting classes…
Is your love life suffering because of your mood? Is it hard to have a healthy relationship when you’re depressed? Absolutely, yes! Mixing depression and relationships is tricky. I know because I’ve been there. I’ve struggled with depression for my…
Many of us hold unrealistic fairytale expectations about marriage which result in disappointment with a spouse or with the institution of marriage itself. Both were true for me when single. Now happily married for 30 years, I still now and…
Premarital counseling might seem like the last item you want on your wedding to-do list, but consider it the best gift to your marriage. Couples counseling isn’t just for those in crisis, or who are experiencing relationship difficulties. Learning to…
We often praise people who give ultimatums, who say things like “By such and such date, if I don’t have a ring, this relationship is over.” Or “I want ______, and if you’re not willing to give that to me,…
I’ve been thinking a lot about a growing trend in divorce — one that seems to happen right after the holidays. The case of spouse abandonment, aka when you thought the marriage was fine and you were looking forward to…
We assume that communication should come naturally to us, and maybe we think it does, especially in our romantic relationships. After all, we communicate all the time. We talk to our partners all the time about a wide range of…
Having kids is miraculous and meaningful. And it also tends to disrupt a couple’s emotional connection and sink their relationship satisfaction. Which makes sense. It’s a massive change. Your entire identity shifts, and so does the structure and texture of…
One partner in a couple who have been married nearly four decades, reported that she felt controlled by her husband. When asked if it was always the case, she responded in the affirmative and when taken a step further, and…
You cannot love someone maturely and try to control him (or her). The behaviors of both partners should be voluntary. As you discuss the kind of life you want to have together, focus on what really fits for you. Ideally,…
You have a choice every time you say something to someone. By your choice of words, your tone of voice and your body language, you nurture or weaken a relationship. Now I know a few people who will take this…
What do you do when you discover that your partner has betrayed you? Who do you tell? Who do you lean on for support, advice and a reality check? Where do you turn when you are hurt, enraged and devastated?…
Most of us want to have a successful relationship, and yet there are behaviors that we engage in that are surefire ways of wreaking havoc on our relationship. A likely cause is that we didn’t know that our behavior was…